Open your eyes and then open your eyes again.

 I had a hole in my reading history, a big void. I'd read Terry Pratchett when he teamed up with Neil Gaiman with Good Omens but hadn't ventured much into the Pratchett catalog. It's a daunting catalog, to be fair, and I really didn't have any idea where to start. 

As I was listening to Craftlit (currently running The Personal Recollections of Joan of Arc by Mark Twain), Heather, the host, mentioned The Wee Free Men by Terry Pratchett and even said that, while it's a YA book, it's an excellent place to start. Perfect! And my library had the audiobook! More Perfecter!

The Wee Free Men (narrated by Stephen Briggs) is an EXCELLENT book for young adults and adults. Tiffany Aching is a 9 year old girl who is a bit different from other 9 year old girls. She regularly has to care for her younger brother, Wentworth, and she is very good at doing her chores, including making butter and cheese. Her grandma, Granny Aching, has passed on but Tiffany greatly admired her. Turns out, Tiffany is a lot like Granny Aching. She's a witch. 

Tiffany always aspired to be a witch, but the day that she saw little blue men in kilts and Jenny Greenteeth, a green monster coming up from the water, she realized there is more to the world than she was aware. In order to get rid of Jenny Greenteeth, Tiffany uses her little brother as bait, then smacks Jenny with an iron frying pan. Ingenious and clever, Tiffany is.

At this point, the wee blue men, The Nac Mac Feegles, come out of hiding enough to interact with Tiffany and she meets with up with another witch, Miss Tick who explains some things to her and also just adds to Tiffany's confusion. While Miss Tick leaves to fetch more witches, she leaves her familiar, a toad with somewhat good advice, to help Tiffany navigate her new world.

When Tiffany's brother is kidnapped by the Queen of the Fairies, Tiffany full on enters a new reality with the Nac Mac Feegles by her side. She takes on dreamland (not as nice as it might sound) and the Queen in a quest to save her brother (even though she doesn't really like him THAT much).

This novel is technically first in the Tiffany Aching series and 30th in the entire Discworld series. It really is a perfect introduction to Pratchett and the worlds he created. Tiffany is such a smart and brave girl, you often forget she's only 9. When everyone around her is scared to move forward, she marches ahead with her frying pan, ready to face down whatever crosses her path. She really doesn't tolerate patronizing adults and is able to think her way out of sticky situations.

The Nac Mac Feegles are always ready to fight, drink, and steal for any cause and stay by Tiffany through her quest. They are hilarious and Stephen Briggs' narration with their Scottish accents is superb.

There are 5 novels in Tiffany's series and I'm thoroughly excited to tackle them all!

This fellow recorded the entire book - click the link to the first chapter and to see the whole playlist

Burnt out?

 I tend to somewhat listen to TED talk podcasts, usually with just one ear while I knit or drive to work. One in particular made me start from the beginning because I felt like they were describing my life.

Guys. I think I'm burnt out.

I have the TED talk below but the gist is how stress can manifest into physical symptoms and how to deal with them. The authors of the book Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle were the TED speakers and I was convinced enough to go out and get the book.

Knowing that burn out isn't just a workplace phenomenon, how do you recognize it when it happens?

Depersonalization: separating yourself emotionally from your work/activities and you don't feel it's meaningful anymore

Decreased sense of accomplishment: you work hard but you don't feel like you are making a difference

Emotional exhaustion: 'nuff said

Check. Check. Check. I AM burned out.

The Nagoski sisters, Emily and Amelia, gives us a lot of science-backed information about stress, stressors, escaping the lions, completing a stress cycle, to help us deal with our stress. Unfortunately, in today's world, we have chronic stressors, things that just don't go away (apparently commutes are some of the worst chronic stressors) so we are in a constant fight, flight, or freeze response. Is it any wonder we all feel terrible all the time? The toll this takes on your body!

They teach how to complete the stress cycle, ie. letting your body know you are safe and the stressor is not going to harm you. Until you get back in the car and go back to work :)  Exercise is a good stress release but, thankfully, so is creativity. Painting, knitting, creating something, those are all good ways to make sure your brain and body know that you are in a good place.

Women deal with different stresses than men (#NotAllMen, I know I know) so this book is geared more towards women and the issues we deal with. In relationships, women tend to carry the load of parenting and household chores, even while working full time. In life, women are bombarded more with how we are supposed to look, act, speak, etc. than men. At work, especially if you are in a male centric profession, well, that is just constant stress of making sure you are noticed and given the same opportunities as your male peers (ask me how I know this one). 

Besides completing your stress cycles, the book talks about relationships. How women use relationships to help them get through stressful situations. We may think we can get through it all on our own but truth is, we can't. They also talk about Human Giver Syndrome, which affects the majority of women. We tend to be the caretakers, the givers, the ones who give up themselves in order to help others. This isn't a terrible thing, it's just not a healthy thing. 

One thing I found out after reading this book is Nicole Sachs, LCSW and her Cure For Chronic Pain site. She focuses on TMS but the science behind this and burnout are the same, I think. Your body will manifest symptoms and pain if you are holding on to stress and trauma. It's been fascinating to read up on the science because while I know I am burnt out, I also have chronic pain that, some days, is near debilitating. Since I've started paying attention, I can tell when my pain might be worse, like after a particularly stressful or upsetting day.

The science behind all of this is cool and scary. Our brains and bodies are just amazing and we really need to start paying more attention to them.

TED talk - interview with the authors

“The good news is that stress is not the problem. The problem is that the strategies that deal with stressors have almost no relationship to the strategies that deal with the physiological reactions our bodies have to those stressors. To be “well” is not to live in a state of perpetual safety and calm, but to move fluidly from a state of adversity, risk, adventure, or excitement, back to safety and calm, and out again. Stress is not bad for you; being stuck is bad for you.”

 

Old..Professional..Killer

 The New York Times has a stellar book review section. It's frankly one of my favorite sections of the paper to read. Usually they have a dedicated page of mystery/thriller reviews that pique my interest. Flush with a tax refund, I ended up ordering several of those books one day. At around 210 pages, Quarry's Blood by Max Allan Collins was a perfect quick read.

It's the latest in the Quarry series and, while I think I would have benefited from starting at the beginning, there wasn't much that wasn't explained from past books. Quarry is a former Vietnam vet/sniper turned professional contract killer turned old dude who wants to be left alone. He's in his 70s now and living out his life managing a little lodge resort in Minnesota. It's mainly set in current (COVID) times but we do get a flashback to the 80s to further set the plot in motion.

Ever the hyper alert former killer, even with bad knees, he's prepared when he gets an unexpected visitor to his cabin. Susan Breedlove is a youngish (to 70+ Quarry, at least) author who has written a book about him and his exploits in the past. Now she wants to do a sequel and wants his help. But wait, how does she find him?? Turns out his pasttime was writing "heavily fictionalized" books about his killings. WTF, man. That's not living in obscurity!

He sends Susan away and tries to get back to his life.

But wait! Someone is trying to kill him! 

That escalated quickly.

Despite the bad knees and prior heart surgery, Quarry is pretty badass still at staying alive. He teams up with Susan to figure out who has a grudge against him (um....everyone?) and ends up traveling around to meet people, maybe kill them, and get his questions answered. There's a lot of corpses. 

A lot of corpses. A lot of sex and strip clubs and sleazy hangouts and shady dudes. Just want you want in a hard boiled crime novel.

I'm off to read the back catalog. 

Razorblade Tears

 That moment when you find a new author that you LOVE and want to read everything, past, present, and future until you die.

S. A. Cosby has me hooked. After reading Blacktop Wasteland, I grabbed Razorblade Tears from the library. Laundry went undone, dishes unwashed, work unworked. I devoured this. And I want more.

I want to just unload about this novel but, alas, I don't want to spoil anything. So read this and get back with me, yes?

Ike Randolph has been out of prison for 15 years, keeping himself under the radar and getting back on his feet. He built up a lawn care/landscaping business that is doing pretty well. He has a wife, a son, and a granddaughter. All seems well until the first page when the police show up at his door to let him know his son has been murdered.

Buddy Lee has been out of prison for a bit and isn't making ends meet. Bills aren't getting paid and his travels into the bottles are getting longer. Buddy finds out his son was murdered.

Isiah Randolph and Derek Lee were married with a little girl. Both were brutally murdered, such that the funerals were closed caskets. Ike and Buddy Lee were the kind of fathers who really didn't take well to their sons being gay. We see the regret and sorrow their untimely deaths caused, enough so that, when the police make no arrests or even progress, Ike and Buddy Lee decide to do some investigating on their own.

Bear in mind, these are not old men who are wandering around town, chatting people up. These are ex-cons, tough, resourceful men. As they start digging in, all of their skills come in to play because shit gets dangerous real fast.

Ike and Buddy Lee play off of each other well, even if the start of their relationship is a bit rocky. The deeper they get into the situation their sons got into, the harder they fight to make sure the killer pays.

The actual killer is buried so damn deep that I honestly lost track of the body count leading to the head of this mess. Ike and Buddy Lee do not fuck around. 

Pretty much every part of this book thrilled me to my core. It's been a while since I sat with some whisky and just READ for hours on end. I needed this.

Cosby didn't just write an action book. When I say this novel is full, trust and believe. 

Interview with the author

Don't call it a love story

Despite my aversion to all things "Happily Ever After", I was inclined to pick up The Stationary Shop by Marjan Kamali because 1) it was described as a bittersweet love story, 2) it's set in Iran, and 3) Shelbey from Shelbey and The Bookstore raved about it (don't watch the video until after you've read the book!)

I honestly didn't feel this was a love story, per se. I personally didn't feel the deep and abiding love between Roya and Bahman but there was definitely something and I felt that. The novel starts off in 2013, in America, with Roya and Walter discussing making an appointment to see an old friend at a nearby nursing home. We really don't know much except that Bahman, the elderly man in the nursing home, broke Roya's heart.

Back in 1953, in Iran, Roya and her sister Zari are listening to their Baba proclaim how they are going to become SOMEBODY. Baba is incredibly progressive for the place and time and he wants his daughters getting a good education, becoming scientists, writers, great woman. Zari doesn't seem destined for any of that and Roya has her head in books all the time (I can relate). Roya's favorite place to visit is The Stationary Shop, where shop owner Mr. Fakhri sets aside books and other stationary items for Roya. 

One day, Bahman, a young man around Roya's age, blows into the shop and back out. But not without the two of them noticing each other. Mr. Fakhri is adamant that Bahman will change the world but jusst as adamant that Roya stay away from him. During this time in Iran, there is political unrest, to put it lightly, and Bahman is in the center of the activist world. True love is apparently meant to be as Bahman and Roya get together, with Mr. Fakhri even helping a bit.

Because this is a really wonderful journey for Roya, I'm loathe to spoil anything. Suffice it to say, Bahman breaks Roya's heart (but does he?) and she moves on to America for an education and a new life. 

I didn't see so much a love story as I saw a desperate need for mental illness to be recognized and addressed. I saw a desperate need for abortion to be considered essential health care. I saw generational trauma, when adults push their issues and trauma on to kids and the trauma-can keeps getting kicked down the road. I saw the need for gender equality (thank goodness for Baba!). 

There is so much more to this book than a love story. 

Interview with the author

 

Son of a ...

 I read Wicked by Gregory Maguire back in 2007. I know I liked it but don't remember more than the basic plot (ignoring the musical - although it's awesome, it's not the book). Somewhere along the way I picked up the second book in the Wicked Years series called Son of a Witch and it lingered in my stacks.

I finally picked it up after reading so many heavy books, expecting a light hearted take on Elphaba's son. That is not what I got.

Liir is just a kid when Dorothy did in Elphaba. He hid with Nanny and the Lion while the deed was done. Afterwards, Dorothy was matter of factly ready to get back to Oz to prove she killed the Wicked Witch, but Liir now had no one. So he went with the crew, back to the Emerald City. Again, as in Wicked, Dorothy is not painted in a good light here and honestly, she shouldn't be. Liir doesn't know if Elphaba was his mom or who his dad is, but he's hoping to find something in Oz. He has no choice. He no longer has a family.

We get this back story on Liir only because his body was found by travelers, nearly every bone broken and on the verge of death, who take him to some sisters (Maunts) who would take him in and try to repair him. His bones are set but he remains in a coma. That is, until Candle, an orphan dropped at the Mauntery by her uncle, sits with Liir and plays her Domingon, music that is causing all of Liir's memories to surface.

While this is happening, we have maunts and travelers who are turning up dead with their faces scraped off (see? not a light hearted read). We have the Wizard gone from Emerald City and Glinda in his place, until she is replace by a straw man government. We also have an Elephant Princess who made Liir promise to help her return to her Animal form with Elphaba's magic that surely he must also possess. 

Everything is a mystery... until it's not. There are so many plot threads to keep up with, but in the end, most makes sense. I enjoyed this book but I had trouble with Liir's moping until about page 200, when he finally became himself. I didn't like most of his decisions but seeing how he was raised and how he had to try and grow up along (Thanks, DOROTHY), he really did the best he could.

Interestingly, the book ends with another green child. The granddaughter of Elphaba.

Fun comparison of the Wizard of Oz movie and Wicked

The truth had a strange way of ending an argument

 Don't you love when a book comes out of nowhere and it turns into one you just can't put down? I hadn't heard of Blacktop Wasteland by S.A. Cosby before I got it through a book club. It was a wild ride!

I knew I liked (some) heist movies, but I don't think I've read many heist books. Blacktop Wasteland is a heist book, full of cars and action, twists and turns. Beauregard "Bug" Montage used to live a life that was bound to kill him. He was one of the best getaway drivers on the East Coast, but once he married Kia and had 2 kids (with one from a previous relationship), he turned straight: an honest mechanic, doing well with his own garage.

But times hit hard. A new, cheaper auto garage came in nearby, wiping out his clientele and causing him to fall behind on payments. Not to mention kids needing braces and glasses. His cousin Kelvin finds him a street race, in hopes of making some money. Bug's Duster is a thing of beauty - not much to look at, but beautiful where it counts. He wins but it's still not enough money to help his troubles.

We get background on Bug's childhood. Absent father, mom who takes her anger out on her son. The background on Ant, Bug's dad, helps us see how Bug's new decisions are pushing him right down the same path. Bug needs a "job" and ol' white trash Ronnie is there with a doozy. Against everything Bug SHOULD be doing, he takes it and plans out the robbery. All would have been well, Bug is smart and knows his shit. Except....

Everything starts hitting the fan in crazy ways that take the book from just a robbery to a full on heist and possibly redemption. It's another book that is worth your time on the ride, even if it means a book hangover in the morning. You really have it all: fully fleshed out characters that you are invested in, a plot that doesn't stay in a straight line, and a world that you can be immersed in, taking the hits with the characters.

I don't say this often, but I really hope this becomes a movie.

S.A. Cosby, a Writer of Violent Noirs, Claims the Rural South as His Own

Interview with S.A. Cosby